The Emergence of Church Experts (and the suppression of violence)

The Emergence of Church Experts
(and the suppression of violence)

by Doug Bursch

If you say one more bad thing about the church I love…

I’m gonna punch you in the nose.

And then I’m gonna say I’m sorry.
But I swear if you say one more bad thing…
I might do it again.

Yeah, I’m aware it’s not theologically correct.
But neither are you with your perpetual snarky,
Condescending diatribes against the Bride.

I figure God’s grace will call it a tie…
My fist and your bitter, flame throwing tongue!

You are so comfortable with being better than everyone.
With your better understanding and your better way of doing everything.

You’re more missional, more intentional, more visionary
With your revolutionary understanding of what everyone else is doing wrong.

Spitting out tweets between microbrew sips.
Turning out relevant books and relevant conferences
As you troll the world for emerging Pharisees.

You’re so used to tearing down the Bride.
Talking as if you have exclusive rights to her hand.

I swear, if you say, write or print one more arrogant word…
I’m gonna break your nose.

That’s fine.
Feel free to call me a bitter, reactionary, out of touch relic.

That’s fine.
See me as deceived and bound by outdated, outmoded ritualism.

I’m cool with that…but stop it!
Stop tearing down the Bride!
Or I swear my hand will form a fist and I’ll follow through.
(These are the thoughts I repent of almost every time I hear you speak).

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3 Responses to The Emergence of Church Experts (and the suppression of violence)

  1. Joe December 20, 2012 at 1:44 pm #

    I liked this Doug. Clever and so true!

  2. Chad January 2, 2013 at 8:53 pm #

    So, are you talking about those who rightly discern the silly stuff that happens in churches that has nothing to do with the Spirit or heart of God, or are you talking about those who are criticizing the entire church without love, in judgment and condemnation.

    My observation is this: Most of what is called church today, isn’t really the true church. It seems to me that certain people are not attacking the church as a whole, but are attacking the falsehoods and traditions of men that really aren’t church.

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